14 May 2006

Stressing About Future Stress

The carpet feels soft and snuggly beneath my feet. I finally turned on the heater because it got a bit chilly with the rain today. I’m sipping a hot Mocha Chai tea. I just read Kikoti’s comprehensive exam questions from Todd and Curt. They are tough and detailed. I couldn’t adequately answer them myself if I sat down and gave it a shot today. That makes me scared. Not scared that I don’t know enough, or haven’t learned anything this semester, but scared to let Todd down, my advisor. It is embarrassment. Then I start fretting about all of the classes I’ll be taking in the fall all while trying to study for comprehensive exams and prepare for years of fieldwork. I could lessen the burden a bit by staying through January in the States, but I need to be in country in Thailand in person to get things going. I was just planning on taking Multivariate statistics and Evolution next fall, but since I’m now doing the joint OEB/WFCON degree I had to tack on a policy course. Then Todd decided I can’t really waive the Communicating Science requirement either, so just go ahead and add that too. Ok, why not just add ANOTHER course. I can see the stress already and then float back to second guessing myself.

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